I realized something this weekend....

I have four weeks left.

dun. Dun. DUUUUUN.

And it's a really weird realization let me tell you! I've gotten into the mental habit of being on the mission and the thought of not being on my mission soon is honestly kind of disconcerting...

I'm trying not to think about it.

Changing the subject: We had Ward Conference yesterday and it was really good. I took notes just like I do for General Conference and I got a couple pages of goodness. One story that was told I really liked. The speaker related the time where to save money the missionaries were given Tandem Bikes instead of two bikes per companionship. One pair of Elders had an appointment at the very top of a tall hill, almost a mountain. They started up and the one in front was putting in all his effort, it was getting harder and harder but the Elder put all he had into it and in the end they made it to the top. Exhausted he looks at his companion behind and said, "We made it! I almost thought we wouldn't!" And his companion replied, "Me neither! I was afraid that we would fall back down so after half way I was putting on the brakes!"

Which one of these two are we? Are we the kind of person that puts all their strength into going forward and going higher? Or are we the kind that is too afraid to lose what we already have and puts on the brakes? The speaker was relating this to Missionary Work. He said that Missionaries are putting all their time and effort into helping people come unto Christ and be Baptized in his True Church. But that sometimes the Members are too afraid of losing what they have, of putting a friendship at risk to reach out and offer a Missionary Visit to their friends and family. But also I think that story could be related to any part in our lives. I know that I put on the brakes sometimes in my own life out of fear. My Mission is helping me a lot to try and get over that. I'm still far from perfect, but I'm closer than I was a year and a half ago. And I'm content with that amount of progress. I'll be working on this project (myself) for as long as I live.

And a Funny Anecdote: Apparently at 4:30am this morning I woke up my companion Hermana Barton because I jerked up out of bed and cried "We Gotta Go!", then I looked at the clock and make a grumpy sigh and fell back to sleep. Now, what makes this even funnier is that I have ABSOLUTELY no recollection of having done such a thing. I totally believe her, but I can't remember it for the life of me. And think that's the closest I've ever gotten to sleep walking.

Over and out,
~ Hermana Smart